That the potato should go in the front.. English Jokes

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The Perfect Son.
A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.
Two police officers crash their car into a tree. 
After a moment of silence, one of them says, 
“Wow, that’s got to be the fastest we ever got to the accident site.”
An elementary school teacher sends this note to all parents on the first day of school.
.
"If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school, I will promise not to believe everything your child says happens at home.
Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things.
Boy: What are the two things?
Girl: Your feet.
Boy complains to his father: You told me to put a potato in my swimming trunks! You said it would impress the girls at the pool! But you forgot to mention one thing!

Father: Really, what?

Boy: That the potato should go in the front.
A student is talking to his teacher.

Student: "Would you punish me for something I didn`t do?"
Teacher:" Of course not."
Student: "Good, because I haven't done my homework."
A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up.

"Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?"

"Wrong number," replied the girl.

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